I live... I learn

why...

2006-05-21T01:34:00.000+08:00

Why do you need to be so perfect?

Why do you need to have that natural charming smile that brightens up my stressful days?Why do you need to have that spellbinding looks that mesmerize me in an instance?Why do you need to be so fun to be with that makes me want to be near you all the time?Why do you need to have all the things I’ve wished for that makes me think that you’re truly the one?
Why do you need to have all these things when I know that it will be impossible for us to be together?

Why are things like this? Why do I need to be tortured like this?

last stretch...

2006-03-09T00:36:00.000+08:00

I have two more weeks before the finals and I'm actually dying right now because of the tons of requirements that I need to do (Long Tests, Orals, Full-blown Qualitative Research Paper, projects, Latin Festivals, etc.). Although, amidst such things, I still manage to watch my favorite shows, chat online, and of course... update my blog.

>>> This sem would be very different as compared to last semester because I need to Final Tests in most of my subjects (since they won't be offering exemptions and since the only two subjects that offer exemptions require an A or B+ *that would cover a fraction of our total grading system*) Oh well, this means that I need to study more... and not lose my focus because of the "vacation-is-so-near-i-don't-want-to-study-anymore" sickness.

>>> During the meeting last monday, the party members (that were present during the meetin) decided that Partido Agila will have its reconstruction this summer by fixing it's principles, line-up, and strategies for the campaign next school year. Marvyn was elected to be the party chair. Ergo, partido agila will definitely be active this year! lol!

>>> I so love Mandissa (spelling check) right now in A.I. I really hope that she'll win the A.I. this season. She's just one heck of a performer and singer. Her vocal range is incredible and she's like the next Aretha Franklin! Wohooooo! On to another reality show, PBB Celebrity Special is becoming interesting right now with the newly formed alliances and division. It's becoming like the Survivor All Star thingie! Woot! I just hope that Keanna won't be thrown out of it YET! She's like the spice in that show and the source of all kinds of weird yet very real human behavior/attitude/whatsoever...

>>> Oh yes, how can I not mention you right now. You're becoming cuter and cuter every time I see you! hahahah!

so near yet so far...

2006-02-27T21:15:00.000+08:00

Summer is so near but I still need to do tons of homeworks, long tests, papers, pre-finals, orals, etc. before I'll avail all the incentives of summer vacation. I'm practically dead for the this week until next week and I'll be semi-dead for the remaining of the weeks before the finals, which would start on March 20.

I know that this time of the school year is when I get so lazy already that I don't feel like studying anymore. However, this is also the crucial time that would eventually determine my final grades for my subjects... plus, it would be the make-or-break part of whether or not I'll be accepted at the AB/MA Polsci track. *sigh*

After this semester, resurrection would eventually come in! Blah!God Bless to everyone who is under their hell week(s) or whatsoever you call them!

Cheers!

having intimidating parents-in-law...how i wish!

2006-02-25T01:59:00.000+08:00

What would you do if you find out that the parents of your "ideal someone" are part of the "hegemonic" intellectuals in their respective professions in your country? More so, what would you do if they are the ones who you would end up working with in the future?

Why do you need to be so perfect... even your family?

I know I should stop thinking about all these things.... but what the heck, you can't read this blog! *grin*

Remembering EDSA I

2006-02-23T16:52:00.000+08:00

In February 1986, people all over the world celebrated the triumph of democracy in the Philippines. Different countries, organizations, media association, and others were captivated with the impressive “bloodless revolution” that the Filipinos demonstrated for their plight in restoring democracy from the hands of a tyrant.
Many people who joined the bloodless revolution hailed from different sectors. Some came from the elites while others came from the masses—the social strata that have divided the country were suddenly forgotten for the sake of upholding justice. And what was really significant in this event was the idea that rosaries and armless civilians were able to defeat an army commanded by a dictator. All of these things took place some 20 years ago in EDSA and is now remembered as EDSA I or People Power I.
EDSA I was considered by people as the epitome of democracy. It was an event orchestrated by the people and eventually became successful because of the people themselves. Because of this, democracy was put in a higher level of understanding among the Filipinos. We learned that the real essence of democracy comes from us—the people that propel the Philippines as a country. It’s from us where the power of the government emanates and it’s from us where the government gets its mandate to rule. Filipinos realized that the government should never see itself as a so-powerful entity in the society because at the end of the day, it’s still the people who are the real powerful entities in this state. However, the greatest lesson that Filipinos have learned through it is the idea of making sure that the freedoms that were encroached upon by the Martial Law will never be stolen from them again. As such, Filipinos have learned to condemn any act of corruption and “cronyism,” to fight for expressing their sentiments (that are valid), to ask for accountability and transparency, and to make sure that the process of law will always be followed. But after 20 years, have Filipinos really learned from all the things they fought for in EDSA I?
It’s really sad to see on how Filipinos have been victims again of the same crimes that we fought against during EDSA I. It’s as if we’re being haunted once again by the ghosts of the crimes committed against us—and we’re just allowing them to terrorize us again.
The recent election scandal clearly demonstrates how we haven’t really learned anything from EDSA I. It’s funny on how the product of the “labeled” 2nd EDSA is now the perpetrator of the crimes being committed in the status quo—crimes that are very much similar to the ones that were committed by the tyrant we overthrew during EDSA I. To make things grander (of course, in a sarcastic way), things that we condemned during EDSA I are slowly creeping back again in our society such us election fraud, unlawful processes, greed for power and the marginalization of the real essence of democracy. It’s like “history is repeating itself!” Although I’m quite pessimistic with this kind of logic because for me, history doesn’t repeat itself—it’s us, human beings, who repeat history (which clearly shows how we really don’t learn from our mistakes—most of the times)!
With this said, two things are in my bugging my head right now: have we learned nothing at all from EDSA I? If so, have we betrayed the ideals that were raised during that glorious moment in our history?
I’m really not 100% pessimistic in answering the first question. I still believe that we’ve learned some things about it, like making sure that no one can easily declare the Martial Law (that’s why the provision of the 1987 Constitution makes sure that Martial Law is infeasible in the status quo) and that Filipinos have the power to overthrow any leader that we think is incapable of governing because of dubious acts. However, there are still some things that we still haven’t learned until now. I think that Filipinos are still not that politically matured that sometimes, we tend to abuse our rights to elect the rightful officials during elections. More so, we easily allow our sentiments overpower our rational thought in deciding for the welfare of our political institutions—moreover, our state. I also think that we still haven’t learned on how many politicians are easily succumbed to power when they get the position already. But I guess the biggest lesson that we still haven’t learned so far is to be politically conscious on the different things that are happening in our political institutions so that we won’t be fooled by their “magic.”
Based on all these said, I believe that we, Filipinos, have truly betrayed the ideals that were fought for and we have shunned on the principles that we tried to uphold during EDSA I. It’s truly sad to see that EDSA I, which has been celebrated internationally, has died as time went by. We have forgotten all about them and allowed ourselves to be corrupted by the same crimes that have tormented many of us during those times. Although this doesn’t mean that we’re totally helpless. I think that remembering EDSA I shouldn’t be limited to just look back at the past events. Instead, we should go back and understand the underlying premises of why it happened and why we fought for them, so as to recall the lessons that arose from such incident. Because by doing such, we would still be able to resurrect the ideals of EDSA I that have somewhat been overshadowed by time itself.
I hope that as we think back to EDSA I, each and every one of us would realize the relevance of it, more so realize that we’ve already forgotten every lesson we learned from it. It’s not yet too late for us to really uphold the things we’re supposed to learn from it. As a young member of this society, I hope that we’ll finally put into practice everything we’ve learned from it so as in the future, when we’re the ones who are remembering and sharing its triumph to the younger generations—they wouldn’t ask anymore if EDSA I is still alive in their times.

what an irony...

2006-02-12T15:18:00.000+08:00

I just realized that I've met my ideal someone--the perfect person who I wished for since 1st year high. The sad thing however is that we can never be together, and that's for sure! *sigh* Is this a sign that I'll really end up alone? Blah!

why do you need to be the person I've longed for... are you just punishing me for knowing the fact you and i can never be together? *shit!*

"You're beautiful. You're beautiful.You're beautiful, it's true.I saw your face in a crowded place,And I don't know what to do,'Cause I'll never be with you.You're beautiful. You're beautiful.You're beautiful, it's true.There must be an angel with a smile on her face,When she thought up that I should be with you.But it's time to face the truth,I will never be with you."

waaaah....

2006-02-08T21:52:00.000+08:00

I'm not happy with the grades i'm receiving right now. I really don't know but they seem to be so fraustrating! It's probably because my standards are too high. I don't know but since I shifted to polsci, I've never settled for mediocrity or the ones that I did during the first year of college-- okay na ang D! I so hate this feeling! But I guess, the most probable reason why this is happening is because I've been neglecting my acads lately. I've been too busy with this partido agila campaign and I oftentimes had I prioritized campaign stuff over acads. Blah! I don't know, but i see that it's still worth it since I'm now doing what I love most--doing extra-curricular activities, more so... being able to interact with other people. *sigh* this is probably one of the lowest points since I entered polsci... i so hate it when you've just been labelled as "smart" kid in your block--the pressures have doubled!

double the struggle

2006-01-29T23:03:00.000+08:00

Life in school has been worse than last semester. I really couldn't believe that this sem would be as worse as what's happening now.

Acad life has been so-so good/bad. I received high grades in some subjects while i received lower grades (than what I expected) in others. I really don't know why this is happening. I probably got so used to the grades I had last semester; plus, the pressure for me this sem is bigger (way BIGGER) that gives me a harder time to study. I really need to work harder to pull my grades higher! I need to reach the 3.0 quota or better yet, reach the DL's list once again this sem

Extra-curricular life in school has been HELL. I decided to run for the university student council under the Partido Agila. I'm running for the School of Social Sciences Sec-treas position. It's like VP/Sec/Treas in one. Waaaah! (now, i don't know why i chose that position) Three weeks in the party has already exhausted most of my time. But I don't regret my decision for running and joining the partido. The benefitsts outweighed the detriments. I met new faces... nice people, shopped for clothers (haha, i know... this is a weird benefit but because of the color coding scheme we have--it has just been feasible lol), countless pictorials, and having a sense of responsibility which has been gone for sometime now, since I entered college (long running sentence.. wheeee! lol)

Anyway, I know i should be sleeping now to be prepared for our LT in POS 53 (which just consumed 2 days of studying)... so until next time. Blah!

As another chapter ends...

2006-01-02T19:30:00.000+08:00

2005 proved to be a year full of surprises and mixed emotions. I shifted out of BS Legal Management and shifted to AB Political Science, I realized how I love Political Science so much that I'm now thinking whether or not I'll still pursue law, I met a new set of wonderful and fun people (Block I2 and the Ya-ya Sisterhood, and the Polsci 2008!), I lost two relatives, I needed to be a source of strength to someone amidst the super stress I experienced at the same time, surprising news about friends, school grade, etc. Hay.... all these things happened in just one year.

I have to say that amidst the bad things that happened, I can still consider year 2005 as a wonderful and meaningful year (I guess, the good things outweighed the bad ones) and I'm very thankful for it being wonderful and nice. 2005 would definitely be included as one of the most memorable years.

As I spend the 2nd day of the new year (2006), I hope and wish that it would turn to be wonderful and meaningful as well. I also intend to accomplish few things this year, thus my list of the things I have to do for this year:

1) Stop saying bad words and cursing (now, this is probably one of my priorities for this year)
2) Shut up instead of saying something bad (in connection to my first goal)
3) Be more focused with my studies (no more of daydreaming)... I won't achieve my dreams if I'll just continue dreaming with little effort being put in to my works....
4) Start building my vocabulary ( I mean, I sound so elementary compared to other people when I talk about politics--I want to sound more scholarly).
5) Start being serious about working out ( I need to work-out na SERIOUSLY!)
6) Stop being to materialistic.... (blah!)
7) Need to start reading The Economist more religiously
8) Need to have a 4 QPI
9) Qualify for the AB/MA Political Science
10) Join debate tournaments once again....

.... Okay, that's it! I have quite a long list to do and I know I should start working with them now.... until next time. Here's to year 2006! Cheers!

Paskuhan 2005

2005-12-27T18:46:00.000+08:00

The annual reunion of my father's (mother's) side was held yesterday in Vermont Park Royal Club House. It was hosted by my Tita Amy's Family. It was almost a perfect attendance event for our family (only one family was absent and one of my tita and tito didn't attend the reunion). It was practically swarmed by my younger cousins and pamangkins. They went up and down the stairs, ran around and around and around, danced all throughout the program (which lasted for more than 5 hours--including the gift and money giving), played with the balloons, etc. I even got tired just watching them--I might be getting old (lol!)

It was actually fun. My parents, together with my titos and titas, and my cousins and pamangkins danced the song of the Pinoy Big Brother nonstop! I tried to count how many times it was played but I failed--it was too freaking annoying already. The last count, before it struck my sanity, was 12-- and it was just after 3 hours since we arrived. Blah! I also joined practically every game. I even joined the "Amazing Race" where a plate flour was thrown at me and I ran across the club house. But the best game ever in the party was the Beer Drinking Contest for ages 16-20! It was like you're being paid to drink beer... lol!

I guess, it was one of the best--if not--the best reunion until now... and it just gives my family the pressure to host a reunion as nice and fun like it next year.

on a topic that is totally irrelevant to our reunion:
The things that I need to do during this break is insane. I really couldn't believe that there are some people who can work amidst the countless celebrations....

When will waiting for 'the one'... be done...

2005-12-22T16:02:00.000+08:00

"When will waiting for 'the one'... be done?" -Carrie

Waiting is probably one of the hardest things we do in our lives. It seems to give us severe anxiety and sense of uneasiness whenever we do it. There's something in waiting that is so not us. It might probably be that most of us are impatient people who don’t have the word "wait" in our dictionary. It might also possibly be that we're so pessimistic that we feel that waiting means waiting in vain. There might be so many other reasons why people don't like the idea of waiting... and no answer can literally sum it all up. I guess, it's one of the greatest mysteries in human history--people are allergic to waiting today.

It's funny to think that people in our times can't afford to wait when in fact; people in the past seemed to spend their entire lives in waiting. In fact, when we had our Theology discussion about Dei Verbum, our Professor talked about how people in the OT waited in their entire lives--not just waited in patience, but rather, waited patiently and faithfully. Now, I know that these are people in the Bible and they seem to be more fictional than non-fictional characters (of course, this is still debatable) but, people outside the Bible also illustrated the act of waiting patiently and faithfully. People during the stone ages waited for animals and for weather, people in the midieval time were so patient waiting for the cure for their sickness, lands, etc. Early Filipinos also waited patiently and faithfully to gain independence and to be finally called as Filipinos. And based on these examples, we can see that people can actually wait patiently and faithfully before. However, with the changes that occured throughout time, waiting seemed to be lost in the things that people—us, do in our lives. We seem to alienate the idea of waiting in our lives.

The other day, I was able to talk to one of my best friends and “waiting” was our topic. He told me that the reason why he has a negative thought about waiting is because he doesn’t want to be frustrated in the future. It seems that having negative thoughts about waiting has become a defense mechanism for him so as not to be upset with whatever that he’s waiting for. He further told me that he has lost faith in waiting because it’s silly to think that God has something for each one of us because how would you account those people who died in poverty, severe depressions, and painful experiences—all of them waited in vain. With all these unfortunate things about waiting, he asked me: Do you still think that waiting patiently and faithfully is still a good option to do?

Having heard about what my best friend had to say, my notion about waiting still hasn’t diminished at all. I know that my best friend has his own set of reasons why he had that stance on waiting. However, I still believe that waiting shouldn't be alienated in our lives. Rather, I believe that waiting is a virtue that we should learn in our lives.

I know that waiting is really hard and I definitely concur to that idea. However, it doesn't mean that we should neglect it already. What we should do instead is to try changing our perspectives about it rather than treating it as a big "no-no" in our lives. I guess that the main reason why many people don't want to wait is because of the idea that we're not assured that we'll get the things we want if we wait. Thus, these people don't want to end up being frustrated. In this reason, we can see that the people who fall under this category has the idea that they would get something big in their lives... they'll get rich, they'll be able to meet their ideal spouses, they'll get their dream job, etc. However, this is not the real case.

We get "what we want" or what we need in due time and in due amount. It doesn't mean that you'll get the things right at the snap of your fingers. More so, it doesn't mean that we'll get the things as we exactly imagined them to be. All these things come in the right time and in the right form that would benefit us more. We just don't realize them when they come and I guess that it's our biggest problem in dealing with these things. And based on this, we can clearly see that waiting is not the only problem that most of us have. Learning to be contented with the things that are for us is also one of our biggest problems--including myself. (i don't want to talk about this more because i intend t put this to the next entry of mine).

So in asnwering the question I asked at the first part of this entry, "when will the waiting for the one be done?" I really don't know when but I'm definitely sure that it will come--we just need to know how to distinguish it and appreciate whatever/whoever "the one" is.

Christmas story part I

2005-12-17T22:42:00.000+08:00

Christmas is just around the corner and i can certainly feel it. Though christmas decors are no where to be found in our house (yes, we don't like Christmas decorations flaunting inside and outside our house), I can still feel it through the cold gush of wind at nights and the Christmas songs that are played over and over in malls, fm stations, etc (sometimes, they're so annoying already! lol!).

Anyways, since it's hardly a week before Christmas, there are so many things that I (together with my family) should rush for. We still need to buy gifts, reserve accomodations, have our money change (100-500-1000 bills), wrap the gifts, etc. *sigh* But i don't mind all the hassle and bustle because everything will be worth it.

Venting out....

2005-12-13T23:21:00.000+08:00

I'm so stressed with the LTS, papers, and quizzes that I have right now. I don't even know which will I do/study first. What makes things worse is the fact that my parents are so annoying right now that I'm hating them again! Argh! Why do they always need to assume that all I'm doing and saying are all about being--malandi? Dagnamit! I so hate it!

Why do parents need to be annoying when you're already in some deep shit?!?!?!??!?!?!

School equals to stress

2005-12-08T16:33:00.000+08:00

I really couldn't believe that my readings and my list of things-to-do for next week are totally out of my reach. My readings are more than 3 inches for next week and I have tests everyday next week... plus, three long tests in just one day! This is a very bloody nightmare for me! Blah!

Life in Second Sem so Far

2005-11-24T17:25:00.000+08:00

I don't know if I'll be able to pull my acts once again this semester. I feel quite lost. I really don't know if it's because it takes me quite a time to adjust and get my rhythm in studying again. Gaah! I need it faster because second sem has a shorter period of time! I need to focus, be disciplined with my studies, and work harder... no more space being a procastinator this time.

With these things that I need to do (academic sacrifices...) this sem, I just hope that I'll be able to reach my goals for second semester. First on the list is to be a "4" kid in Ateneo. Yes, I'm now being quite idealistic here again but there's nothing wrong naman to set a goal QPI right... (btw, for everyone's info.. in ateneo: 4 is the highest QPI you can get.. parang 1 sa UP) and there's nothing impossible naman eh as long as you really work hard for it. Second, is to finally fix my debate notes and start training seriously with ADS. THus, for my third goal, I plan to be accredited as a varsity member of ADS. Fourth is to be able to finish my "pending" org works. Last is to qualify for the AB/MA Polsci or what they call Polsco Honors.
Grabe, and bigat ng mga goals ko this sem... basta, kaya yan.

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On a weird note, my Ym account might have been hacked (even though the hacker said that the process had an error that's why he/she wasn't able to hack my account). Bago na account ko: wen_meets_marx!
Btw, pareho kami ni nikki na-hack (magkapateeeeeed talaga tayo!lolz)

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School so far is okay...

Our psych teacher had this "announced" surprise quiz but we (my blockmates) ended up being really surprised because we thought that the test would be next meeting pa. Ayun, buti na lang at pumasa pa rin. I'm just thankful that I could still pull my grade since this is just the start.

Readings on the other hand are terrible...
My readings in Pos 53 and 61 are insane--more than 6 or seven inches siya! Waaah!
I just need to be patient in reading once again! Blah!

so far....

2005-11-05T15:57:00.000+08:00

Sem break is like a ticking time bomb--once it's over, the stress and sleepless nights will once again come back... and it's nearing to reach it's time already!

I think that one month of being a bum and having nothing to do is not enough. If you were to compute it, you have around 3 days of break for every 1 grueling week you had in school last sem. But then again, that one month of vacation (supposedly) becomes 3 weeks or less since you still have this one week of registration process. To cut this short, sembreak is not enough to regain all the sleepless nights you (including me) had during the past sem. *blah!*

I'm not yet in the mood to go back even if I'm quite bored already. I just think that I haven't really bored myself from boredom.

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Besides doing nothing, I've been involved in the preparation of my Cuz' debut/party. Well, It's not really this formal kind of debut... more of a party with some touches of the traditions like the 18 treasures, 18 Roses, etc. Going back, I've been helping her with all the preparations (namely: program, looking for a caterer, clothes, concepts, etc). I've been going with her to different malls to look for her clothes and other things that will be needed for her party like floating candles, bowls for popcorn, etc. I'm really hoping that the [party would be a blast.

Also, I've just been appointed as the co-head of one of the projects of Ateneo Lex. It's actually a gig like Shindig and we plan to make it as big as that. Yesterday, I met with cuz (who we'll be my co-head in the project) and with Mike (from Lex) to discuss the details of the project. We had quite a conversation... trying to come up with the name for the event, the people, etc. Right after the meeting, Cuz asked me if I wanted to go somewhere and I said yes. To my surprise, she and Kyle suddenly became so spontaneous that I just realized that we're on our way to Tagaytay. We had no money, no place to stay but we still went. When the three of us reached Tagaytay, we went to People's Park (Yes, it was my first at that place even if I've already been to Tagaytay a couple of times). Right after that, we had our so-called lunch at around 3 pm and went back at around 4. We were crazy for doing that (wasting the gas and all). However, it's actually fun. Being spontaneous in one day makes you forget all the stress and worries you have. I ended my day in having dinner at my Mamita's house to meet the sister-in-law of my lola from the states.

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I know this entry has been longer than my conventional posts, but I don't want to miss the chance to write about my experience when we went to the province for the All Soul's Day.

We left last Saturday around 9:30ish am and arrived at around 1 pm. We went directly at the Hotel and had some time for siesta. After the nice siesta, we went to the house of my Mommy Edna (the eldest sibling of my mom) and had our merienda there. After some merienda and after playing my my pamangkins, we then went to the house of the youngest brother of my lolo (father's side). Then, we directly went to Jp's house (the cutest, smartest, and most adorable cousin I've ever had!) Grabe, super cute niya! lol!

We stayed there for three days before we went home. So happy to see my relatives in the province especially my cousins. So many stories told and so many bonding moments with the to catch up with the things happening to one another. I even learned na may kapatid sa labas 'yung lola! lol!

Okay na sana 'yung vacation in the province if it weren't for the annoying super TRAFFIC on our way back home. (Try to imagine, in one of the towns we had a record of one hour for one kilometer!)

random thought...

2005-10-24T01:11:00.000+08:00

It's truly more difficult to apply your views in real life...

...Sigh...

sembreak....

2005-10-16T18:40:00.000+08:00

I had my last orals last thursday and my last paper to submit last friday. First semester has truly ended. It's weird and so "clicheic," but it really passed by me so fast. It was like just the other day when I first met my new blockmates (shout out to my wild and loveable block I2) and how it was like just the other day when we started to hate POS 60 with our first reading (1-80ish pages). And now, everything is over.

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We had our party last friday night in Toff's place. The party was great (even if many people weren't able to go even if they said yes to us)! Toff made his infamous mix, Puneta and another cocktail. Oh, he was also generous enough to buy tequilla for the night and pizzas and other pica-pica food.

They made me drink too much and hoped that I would be drunk in the latter part of the party. However, I'm way too good in controling myself so as not to be drunk in the party (but one day of hangover was the consequence i couldn't avoid the following day). The ya-ya sisterhood danced again with their famous "dance wall." Gio G. also danced with the ya-ya sisterhood as well as my partner in the , anne. Basta, had so much fun. What a stress relief!

Next stop is our sembreak get-away in Pangasinan or in Fontana!

still running...

2005-10-08T12:37:00.000+08:00

It has been a while since I last updated my blog. I had very busy weeks and I'm still not yet free because of all the paper works and orals I need to do this week. But still, I just want to have a break from all of them and have a little time for my blog.

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For the past few weeks, I've become uncertain on what I want to be in the furture. I really don't know what is happening to me that all of a sudden, I've become unsure of what I really want to be in the future.
When I was around 8 or 9 years old, I wanted to work in the government just like my favorite godmother. I'm really not sure why I wanted to be like that but as far as I can remember, I was just heavily influenced by my godmother. I wanted to work in the government and do all the things she does in her office. However, when I reached high school and until first year college, all my eyes were set of being lawyer. I guess, my debate experiences in high school really made me look forward to it as my career. I got addicted to tv shows like Ally Mcbeal and The Practice where they show the different stories of being a lawyer. I was all in the mood for reading and learning about the law, the difference between what's constitutional and not, what's the different ways of litigation, and others. I was really sure back then that being a lawyer would be my future. I was even looking on the net about the guidelines on how to enter law schools like Columbia, NYU, and even Yale.
But all of these things suddenly became unsure when I was able to shift to Political Science degree. I started to appreciate the different lenses of power, the different approaches in studying politics, the different political philosophies, the decentralization of the government, etc. All of these things started to capture my attentions and that i started to be having fun whenever I read and analyze these things. Thus, I started to like it and even asked for the guidelines for applying for the polsci honors or AB/MA Political Science Career Track.
So right now, I'm really confused which track to choose. I still wanted to be a lawyer but Political Science opened my doors to new possible careers like International Relations or teaching in the Academe. And the worst thing is that I'm still running around with uncertainties even if I need to decide what i really want to be in the future by the end of the semestral break. Oh well, I guess the whole of my Semestral break would be the time for me to think and finally decide...

blah...

2005-07-28T19:26:00.000+08:00

Okay, I've neglected my blog for quite a long time now because of the readings that have kept me busy and consumed all my time (readings in polsci doesn't end at all... *sigh*).

So just to give you a background on the things that have kept me away from blogging and from having a decent social life....
a) I just had a midterm in POS 60 today... imagine a midterm exam that requires you to read age 1-280 of your book. But i think I did well, and I'm happy that all the time used for studying and preparing for it (just four days lang naman-- binasa ko ulit siya!) was not wasted. *thank you Lord for helping me!* (btw, group study rocks!)

b) Readings in POS 100 and POS 51 also consume my time so much.... though, the readings are interesting.

c) English TV-Series review

d) ORG works

d) and other school works!

But I'm thankful that I have been quite disciplined to do and finish all of them! *winks*

****************
On a lighter note, I'm really excited for the inuman/bonding session for the whole 2nd Polsco people on August 12! This will be the first time that we'll have this for our polsci batch! Basta, I'm helping in the planning of this event and I really hope people will come! Pol Sci na ito! *wink*

Hanggang dito na lang... I'll try to post a more reflective entry laters!

Cheers Everyone!

Melange....

2005-07-10T10:15:00.000+08:00

Okay, I had a long weekend but I wasn't productive at all. (frustrations)

It seems that whenever I have time to study in advance or do my assigned homeworks, there will something that will stop me from doing them... this time I had abdominal pains on my lower right side. I'll just need to work longer today! (I was hoping to have a 10 hour sleep but with the things I need to do--- nevermind!)

I need to work harder if I really want to have a high grade and hopefully get a chance to have this exchange program in Hong Kong or China (yes, I'm planning to specialize in Chinese Government for my PolSci career).

**********************

Moving on...
I was able to go out last thursday with one of my best friends, Justin (who also turned 19 that day! WohoooO!) I waited from 2:30-9:00 in school literally doing nothing. When he finished the dreaded accounting long test, I was already outside his roomand had a few chats with some of the people I know (who somewhat cursed me for shifting to another course and doesn't need to take accounting *lolz*). Right after the short chats, we proceeded to Max's Restaurant to have dinner and this time... Justin is treating us for the first time (yeheeY!).

Actually I'm so happy I was able to have dinner with him (even if I had these abdominal pain attacks) because I know that Justin really loved the fact that I was there (knowing his attitude when it comes to friendship) and the fact that I finally met the newest addition to the group...MArio!

I was really impressed on how Mario managed himself in front of me and answered all my whacky questions (lolz). Super bait pa nya... However, i've noticed some hesitations on him but what the heck.. it's just normal for him to have that. Basta, Welcome to the group Mario! :p
(btw, the interogation hasn't started... getting-to-know you lang ang nangyari last thurs *evil grin*)

********************

Waaaah! pressure is what I'm feeling right now in joing ADS! There are some people I really don't know but they know me! They even made jokes that they've been waiting for me!!!!!!!
Crap... now, I really need to push myself to the next level of debating! (this would really mean that I need to lessen my social life and start reading The Economist and other geeky matter more!) Mleeh!

Hope I'll get my momentum back in debating and in academics!

Yes, I'm still alive---struggling though...

2005-07-03T10:08:00.000+08:00

As the country loses its hope on the credibility of our president and the past national election and at the same time many politicians and Non-Civil Organizations are taking advantage of the political turmoil to push for their own interests, here I am reading and trying to be as nerdy as I can.

Honestly, I'm trying to be this so-called nerd so that I can make it to the DL's list this sem (hmm, nothing's impossible) and not to be behind with excessive readings I have in Pol Sci.

I guess many people could notice that it took me a long time just to come up with a long entry and to really update you guys on the different things happening to my twisted life.

First on the list is about my new life as a Political Science student. For those who haven't heard/known, I've transferred from BS Legal Management to AB Political Science because I feel that LM is not the right course for me (blame it on the Math subjects that I don't want to take anymore). Anyway, I just transferred to PolSci and to my new block, I2. the new block is okay. There are some who are really friendly and I got along with them immediately. However, I still haven't memorized all of their names (yes, I'm really bad in remembering the names of the new people I meet) and I haven't talked to all of them. But as a whole, the block is okay. Of course, I couldn't avoid comparing my old block (O2) to my new block which really makes me miss my old blockmates... but that's what life is. *sigh*

Being an AB student is such a new world for me. I have to read more readings than before and that I really don't have any math subjects anymore. I really find it as a new discipline which makes me adjust again to the new life that I have right now as a Pol Sci Student. What makes it weird is that I suddenly longed for a subject that has math on it (total weirdness!). Anyway, Pol Sci hasn't been that easy (which is the complete opposite of what I have been thinking when I shifted to PolSci) because of the tons of readings we need to read and to analyze. Makes things worse, the standards of the teachers are so high that you really need to spend a lot and I repeat, A LOT of TIME just to study one reading assignment. Just to tell you how much readings I read everyday, I usually read readings as thick as 55-100 pages in just one pol sci subjects and take note, I have three pol sci subjects right now plus Asian History, Sociology and Anthropology, and PE 101 plus paper works in English.

As what my PolSci friend told me, "Ang buhay natin sa polsci ay umiikot na lang sa mga readings... gusto ko namang magkaroon ng isang gabing matutulog lang ako at walang kailangang basahing kahit ano!"

*************************

Things have not been that nice...

My lolo (the dad of my dad) just died the weekends before the first day of classes. It was sad because we just celebrated his 80th birthday last March. We needed to goto the province because that's where they've decided to bury him. We stayed there four 4 days and i had to be absent on the first day of classes because of that incident.

The following weekend... we had to go back to the province for the 9th day ritual. When we went back here in Manila, I got sick and I needed to be absent for 3 days! I was like lost and all plus, I wasn't able to attend some of the lectures of some of my teachers that's why in SA class... I wasn't able to answer a lot of numbers because there were things asked when I was absent. *sigh*

But the good thing is that it's just the start of the sem and I know that I could still make-up for my not-so-good quiz in SA and discussions in my POS subjects.

**********************

Frustrations! Why don't things have to go according to what you want?
Was it something I said or was it something I did? Could you tell me where i've gone wrong?

*sigh*

Who Says Life is Fair?

2005-07-02T12:51:00.000+08:00

"You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
And all of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending...."

"It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done..."

In life, we often don't get the things we planned and hoped for. It's just so sad that when this happens to us-- it's as if the whole world crumbles into pieces. I guess this is just a clear manifestation of how unfair life is.

I really don’t get it why many people curse their lives because it’s unfair. They keep on cursing life for all the bad things happening to them. However, who says life is fair? If you’re to observe life, you’ll see that there are so many unexpected things that happen which are so totally not what you’ve been expecting to happen. The worst thing on these unexpected twists in your life is that they’re often heartbreaking—they just give you pain and more frustrations in life. And so, do we have the right then to ask life why is so unfair most of the times because in reality… life is really HARSH!

Life is indeed harsh and we don’t have the right to curse life because on the very first place, it never promised a fair game. However, I do believe that we still have the right to pour some emotions whenever we’re faced by a chapter in our lives we’re we feel so helpless and down because of this unfair game we play in our lives. It’s not easy to live a life full of uncertainties. It’s even harder to live in a life full of uncertainties and most of the time we get frustrating results.

I myself who had already established the notion of life being unfair long time ago still find it so hard to accept the unfair things life has to offer for me. Sometimes, I can’t see why should things be like this or why should life be so harsh sometimes. I even envy some people because life seems to be nicer to them than to me. These things make me burst into tears sometimes. Even people who have strong personalities also succumb to such emotional pressure because these things are really overwhelming to anyone.

Life is indeed unfair… but it doesn’t mean that we’ll just forever allow frustrations to flood our lives. We also need to learn to stand once again after an unfortunate event and to move one. Just keep on moving because this is life— we can’t escape from it! The only way for us to survive is to keep on moving and learn from all these unfortunate things in our lives. As what Carrie Bradshaw said, “Maybe the best any of us can do is not quit, play the hand we've been given and accessorize what we've got.”

I do hope that I myself, would remember this every time the life is becoming tough and harsh once again…

This is insane...

2005-06-24T23:03:00.000+08:00

First formal week of classes and I'm totally stressed!

I got sick on the very first week and the readings are just too many! I want my vacation... quick!

Mein Henz Brennt...

2005-06-17T22:37:00.000+08:00

Tangina! Why does I have to be always the ill-mannered kid in the family!

"You don't have respect to your parents!"
"You don't have delicadeza!"
"You've forgotten that I'm your parent!"
"Malparido!"

Whatever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Crap! I really don't see why I have to be this evil kid when I'm just trying to explain my side. How come Jerick has all the liberty to talk back? Fuck!

"you tell me that i don't give a thing to all the things you buy for me.... YAH RIGHT!!!!!! AS IF YOU GIVE ALL OF THOSE THINGS BECAUSE YOU LOVE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!"

As we walk to two different paths....

2005-06-09T21:29:00.000+08:00

Time surely does fly so fast! It may sounds like an old cliche but what the heck... it's sooooo true! It was just like the other day when i first saw you guys! We were still shy and not sure how to approach one another (Orsem 2004)-- we don't even know each other's names. And now, we're already in our second year in Ateneo... as O2 people. However, just the other day, there was a new batch of students that will be identified as O2 pipz. The new O2 that would do the things we did when we were still freshmen. *Sigh* Our lives in the ateneo will never be the same again. Before, we used to terrorize the cafeteria of ISO and the main caf with the whacky card games we used to have. From, Pusoy Dos to the weird yet funny killer game.. damn, we indeed infested every place we've been whenever we played cards.And now, were sophomores.

It's also just like the other day when we had our first ever block gimmick/inuman in Eastwood and in Ortigas. We were so eager to experience college life that one of the toasts we had was for our first year in Ateneo which was truly a rollercoaster ride... and I'm thankful that I took the ride with you guys! *winks*

Rollercoaster you might ask?

Well, we had experienced so many ups and downs in our first year in Ateneo. There were moments when we all wanted to just relax and go away from all the stress we had in all the subjects we had... when we wanted to drop the subjects because we simply can't see ourselves passing the subjects (thanksfully, we did pass them!)... when we had our small "tampuhan" and misunderstandings... when we cried because of our academic, family and love problems... when we wanted to scream because we simply can't understand our lessons and when we felt no one understand us... when we wanted to explode because nothing is going our way... Waah! There were so many dramas that happened during our first year. However, were able to overcome all of these things because O2 were always there when one needs a shoulder to cry on or when one needs someone to listen to his or her problem. Grabe, O2... you're really the best!

But of course, O2 people weren't only there during the sad moments... they were also there during our kahibangan/kabaliwan moments. We've cut classes together just to go and catch a movie in Eastwood... we've had countless sleep-overs and using "we have a proj to make alibis..." we've had so many pigfest moments and I've won them all (sorry chip... i'm just a pig when it comes to buffets lolz)... we've shopped in so many malls (ditsi and xiobe, hindi ba kayo nauubusan ng pera? lolz!)... we've eaten so many isaws in UP... we've been seen everyday in Starbucks during the first sem and in Seattle's during the second sem and summer as well... we've been constantly spotted in Valle Verde Country Club eating and then playing tennis and badminton... we've been back to our childhood games playing hide-and-seek in chip's place... we've had so many out-of-town trips where we totally got to bond with one another and have fun (Tagaytay and Davao trips rock!)... and of course, we've been together getting drunk and wasted with all the alcoholic drinks and shots we had from san mig light, red horse, pilsen, vodka ice and cruisers, strong ice, baileys, blowjobs, dirty martini and others.. damn, we really enjoyed every drink we had! I'm so thankful that O2 was so game for everything...

Funny... but all of these things happened in just one year. Some people in college used to tell us that we should be lucky because these closeness isn't found in all the blocks in school. It's not normal to see blockmates (people you've only known for just a few months and knows that he/she will miss a test) willing to cut classes just to talk to you and cheer you up when you have a problem. It's not even normal to see blockmates being so natural to one another (no facade or whatsoever) in the first days of classes. O2 is really a special block that helped me overcome all the challenges I had during my first year in Ateneo.

What's really weird is that if all of these things seem to have happened just the other day (because time flies so fast)... then damn, goodbyes also happen so fast because I'm leaving them earlier than expected. *sigh*

There are some things that we can't avoid in life just like taking a different road from the rest of the group. Yes, for those who haven't heard it... I'm shifting to another course. It's really sad to think that I need to leave this twisted block of mine and start a new life in another block.

I know that I've only been with them for just a year but what really makes it hard for me is that i've already forged a strong bond with all of these people in the block. Everyone of them had shared a special moment with me during my first year in Ateneo. Some people may say that I would still be able to see them but the time I have to be with these guys will never be the same as before. I'll miss so many things I did together with O2. I'll surely miss all the whacky moments we had in block O2. From all the whacky moments in Math 19 with Shirlyn to my out-of-this-world experiences I shared with my twisted family in Davao and Tagaytay... I'll really miss being a whacko person with them. I'll also miss the spontaneous things we did from Ateneo to Ortigas to Valle and back to Ateneo... life wouldn't be that alive again. Of course, I'll really miss the simple things we (the montenegro family) did... from making tambays at the Caf, Seattle's, Starbucks or Coffee bean to our laugh trips *sigh*.

This may sound so clicheic but as what people say, "this doesn't end here!" Having a different block doesn't mean that I wouldn't be able to go out with you guys anymore... hey, I'm just a text away fro you guys. Basta, having different blocks can't separate me from my first family in Ateneo (kahit na hindi ko na kayo masyadong makikita... pipilitin kong sumama sa mga gimmick!).

O2! Ang saya-saya! (corny! hahahaha!)

Favorite Moments:

*Orsem days: Banana pose! hahaha!
*Deck days: Ah, yes... the moments where we would just sit and relax while looking at the horizon and watching the sunset...
*Stranded Night: I really couldn't believe that there was a big flood in Katipunan. Thankfully, Shir was generous enough to let us stay in her condo and have our bonding moments with the block
*Starbucks sessions during the first sem: I really like spending time in Starbucks with you guys just to wait for our first class every monday (math to be precise). It makes me feel relax and ready for the first class
*Movie moments: Such a relief from all the school works and all... saya ng movie especially right after a long test or distribution of grades.
*Tambay kina Chip: One of the funniest and most memorable. Magtaguan daw ba naman sa loob ng bahay at mag-inuman all night kahit na may Midterm the following day.
*Tambay sa Eastwood: Kapag nababagod sa Ateneo-- saan ka pupunta? Eastwood!!!!!
*Tambay sa Sec Walk at kumain ng pansit malabon o lugaw: One of my favorites... simple lang pero super saya. Tamang-tama pagkatapos ng isang test at kung walang pera *winks*
* Pusoy Dos at Majong moments: Kapag walang magawa... eto lang ang katapat!
*Driving Moments: Ang sarap maghabulan ng kotse sa Katpunan hanggang sa Eastwood... near death experience na naman ito! *lol!*
*Inuman Moments: Nothing beats a cold beer lalo na kung sharing time na! lol!
*Out-of-Town Trips: First time kung sumakay ng eroplanong kasama lamang ang mga kaibigan at walang magulang o kasamang matanda... kahit ano pwedeng gawin tulad na lamang ng magpahuli sa pagsakay sa eroplano! (lol!)
*Study Periods: What the hell is this???? Pa-taaaaay! (with the funny accent of ditsi) Wala akong alam! Huh...have we studied this? Sagutan ko lang itong item na ito tpos okay na ako! Argh! I'm too careless! Xiobe: Oopsss! (the chair falls) Sorry Chipeco... i'll fix it!
*Lunch at Caf-Up: Nikki: Wen Guy, let's go look for seats.... Wen: ukie dokie! Pabili ng food.. ako na lang magbabantay ng pwesto natin!
*luch at Wok Dis Way: Ang mura!!!!!!!!! bAkit Ganito ang amoy??? (lolz!)
*Chem Period: Wen: Ditsi, may naiintindihan ka? Ditsi: Wala, kuwentuhan na lang tayo!
*Math Period: too long if i'll put it here... basta, Shirlyn + Wen = kabaliwan! Twinkle + Wen =SSSSHHhhhhhh! Wen+ Xiobe=nawawala na lang bigla gamit ni xiobe! (hahaha!)
*NSTP: Xiobe: Ahia help!!!! Si daddy kinukuha ang shoe ko!!!!!!!!!!!
*YM Moments: one word to encapsulate them all... CHAOS!!!!! hahaha!

Kaya from all the whacky things we did...

...

and the study sessions we had...

...

to the parties we've attended together...

...

to the moments we've bonded...

...

and the fun trips we've been together....

...

Thanks for Everything!...

...

i'll definitely miss O2 especially my twisted yet loving Montenegro Family!!!!

when boredom strikes...

2005-06-08T23:06:00.000+08:00

Crap, i couldn't believe that I could not finish a more seriou entry! It's probably because I'm not in the mood or probably boredom easily makes my brain stop from working in an instance. Yes, i blame boredom for not being productive.

I'm supposed to fix my debate notes but because of laziness... i just decided to do it tom. (I haven't even read the previous issues of The Economist) I couldn't imagine that because I got so bored... my brain also got bored and decided to do nothing important. Mleh!

Things I need to do before classes start:
1) Fix my room (arrange the readings that will still be useful and dispose the clutters in my room)
2) Fix my debate notebook (that's my first assignment to myself if i want to debate once again and if i want to get me rhythm back)
3) Read The Prince, Don Quixote and Globalization and its Discourse
4) Have my self-debate drills once again
5) Meet up with my good old Hs friends

So many things to do....

Extraordinary people I've met for the past 19 years....

2005-06-06T01:03:00.000+08:00

This is to show my gratitude to all the people who has been there for the past 19 years of my life... from my ups and downs-- thanks guys!

Instead of telling how much I want to thank you, I'm going to label you guys to show how I see you in my life...

My control managers:
Adrian, Justin and Lex (my three best friends)

My partners-in-crime:
Shirlyn "aka: Mars!" (my partner in college, especially during math 19)
Nikki "bru" (my partner/kapateed during summer time and for life! loL!)

My Extended Family:
Mommy Fats (the mom who is always proud of whatever... i mean "whatever" i do.. lol!)
Daddy Wes (the dad that is so hairy! loL!)
Ditsi (the one that will give me prada and LV bags... *winks*)
Xiobe (the one and only krung-krung... impish sister...)
Hot Sexy Mama Bitch (hot,hot, hot!)
Twinkletot (eng buddy... pasaway! *winks*)
Chippy (a fantastic councilor and editor)
Kylietot (math wizard)
Ange (my soul sistah....)
Twinie (Wen ka rin? loL! luv yah!)
Guama (tagapasa ng mga forms! O2 beadle,galing!!!)
Block O2 (forever!!!!!!)

People who always remind me to do good in life:
Medri (thy saint)
Glory_be (mag-aral na lang tayo!)

My summer classes buddies:
Honey (the forever beadle...)
Malou (malunggay!!!!!!)

Hong Kong Triad (i'm the third member of course):
Minette (pringles ko!)
Therese (sisicat este sisikat din ang araw... lol)

AdMU friends:
Therie (let's go to the smocket!)
Kenji (fashionista)
Judd (wag mong sasabihin ha?)
Kelvin (circle!)
Krizia (Pulan seat-in)
Billy (nice pic ni ditsi sa id noh? hahaha)
Earl (Cge, tira lang!)
Kahlil (naks, matanglawin!)
Aeo (salamat sa tulong sa Wi-Fi!)
Mommy Bianx (mommy ko sa debate at sa ateneo!)

SC:
Ms. A (mabuhay ang Filipino!)
Dino (Wen, hindi kasi ganyan ang mangyayarai.. we need to make it more feasible)
Borj (May baliw ba sa hospital)
RB (san nga ulit house niyo.... kain tayo sa Chocolate Kiss!)

Debate:
TL (my mentor)
Bom (the one who recruited me in the debsoc)
Robin (i'm not roja!)
Jed (MR. SpeaaaaKeeer!)
BJ (You know what!)
Gabby (Mr. hehehehe Speaker, hehehe)
Steph (Debate ka na ulit wen sa college!?!?!?! *winks*)
Faith (we should have been teammates in DLSU *sigh*)
Grace (bait and galing sa debate... so happy to know you.. )
Estelle (such an inspiring fellow... galing!)
Victor (naks, chief adj!!!!)
Ms. Doyet (thanks ms. Doyet for everything, from Greenbelt escapades to sisig festival!)
Ervin (the white shadow!)
The rest of the debate society (win with honors!)

Hs Friends
Gi (balahura ka talaga)
Chaps (go, sama ako sayo!)
Aure (Dito ka ba kakain)
Martin (Powerplant tayo!)
Geno (shopping!)
RS (Grendel, kakain ka na nman!)
Delwyn (samahan mo ako kay mommy)
Geled, Fin, Joma, Gelo (thanks guys!)

STA:
Ele (woah!)
Pete (Whapack!)
Chino (Ano yan!)
Gervacs (forever seatmate)
RJ (kotse namin gagamitin?)
Tempe (hahaha, magcommute lang tyo.. tutulungan kitang tumawid!)
Mrs. Cruz (Ano ka ba wen, dito ka na lang sa classroom)
Ms. Lavara (wag kang magulo at ang ingay mo...)
Montalban People (thanks for opening my eyes to reality)

My family (thanks for everything)

Thanks GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm now 19... yeaH!

2005-06-06T00:49:00.000+08:00

Wow, I'm already 19! Time surely does fly so fast because it's just like the other day when i celebrated my 18th bday with my family and friends. *Sigh* I'm officially an adult in the society. Now, I'll have more responsibilities in school and family and at the same time, people now expect me to be more matured. Right now, I'm having these mixed emotions that i simply can't put into words....

Right now, I would like to thank God for giving me another year to live and celebrate the beauty of life (damn, I sound like one of those in a beauty pageant... lol). Of course, I would like to thank my parents for continuing to help me survive this harsh place we call eart (and they who I continue to have this love-hate relationship with), my ahiya who never fails to piss me off and continue to annoy me, thanks bro and to pukaykay who is such a wonderful impish kid. I would also like to thank my three bestfriends who are always there to help me and to control me.... to everyone who has been a part of my 19 year journey.... THANK YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!

for the past few days...

2005-06-05T15:00:00.000+08:00

I'm so happy that I was able to go out with best friends and was able to patch up on the different things and stories we missed because of our heavy and conflicting schedules in college. I couldn't believe that all of us have changed a lot...

I was also busy for the past few days because I had a couple of advance birthday celebrations with some of my close friends. I already celebrated my bday with my bestfriends together with my first cousins. I went out with some of my High School friends and with my student council friends. The celebrations were expensive but they were all worth it. I was able to meet some of my friends that I haven't seen for the past few months.. even a year. We were able to patch the things we missed due to the "forever reason: conflict of schedule" and because of some problems. I'm so happy to see them once again.

Thanks Guys!

You Don't Know Me.... sigh

2005-06-02T22:00:00.000+08:00

You Don't Know Me
by Jann Arden

"You give your hand to me
And then you say hello
And I can hardly speak
My heart is beating so
And anyone can tell
You think you know me well
But you don't know me
No you don't know the one
Who dreams of you at night
And longs to kiss your
Longs to hold you tight
Oh I am just a friend
That's all I've ever been
Cause you don't know me
I never knew the art of making love
No my heart aches with love for you
Afraid and shy I let my chance go by
The chance that you might love me too
You give your hand to me
And then you say goodbye
I watch you walk away beside the lucky guy
Oh you will never know
The one who loves you so
Well you don't know me
You give your hand to me
And then you say goodbye
I watch you walk away beside the lucky guy
Oh you will never know
The one who loves you so
Cause you don't know me
Oh no you don't know me
OOhh...you don't know me"

I should have told you... and now, I totally regret not doing it.

Hong Kong 1/3

2005-05-31T16:23:00.000+08:00

Hong Kong is probably one of the places I would love to live in the future. The place is so nice and most people seem to be disciplined enough not to violate the rules.

Vacation in Hong Kong is probably one of the best so far. Besides the shopping spree that I got and the chance to see as many “yen taw” as possible, my vacation in Hong Kong is probably the only vacation that I had the chance to reflect on a lot of things which makes it so memorable and enjoying.

We left the country at around 3:45. The trip was okay—the food was great (for the first time). I had this seafood meal which was better than the ones I had before. I also got the window side sit which was great because I always get the middle-sit. Over-all, the trip was pretty good.

We arrived at the Hong Kong International Airport at around past five…I think. The line in the immigration was so long. Thankfully, I was able to see yen taw while we were on the line which made me enjoy the tedious immigration process. Anyway, after the tedious yet enjoying immigration thing, we directly went to this small booth to see the tour agency (this is the first time we got the chance to join a package tour since my dad doesn’t want to have any hassle in exploring Hong Kong).

The tour was not that okay for me because my primary reason to go to the trip was not to have this sigh-seeing escapades but to shop. The tour consumed most of our stay in Hong Kong that left us lesser time for shopping. Thankfully, we were able to get a hotel that is situated in the middle of the shopping district (near the cheap stores and the expensive stores). Going back to the tour, we were able to go to Ocean Park, Shenzen (that’s already China) and other places that didn’t give any impact to me as a tourist. Ocean Park is probably one of the main attractions of HK. It’s like the Disneyland for now (until Disneyland Hk opens on September 12, 2005) with an underwater theme. It was fun because you won’t be able to see that in the Philippines especially the underwater tank full of fishie-fishie (hahaha, term used by xiobe to a fish). Shenzen on the other hand showed me a different face of China. It’s one of the four “special economic zones” in China which is like a makati center here in the country. It has a lot of tall buildings and nice places which is the opposite of what people think about China.

The best thing for me in HK is to have your parents with you and have a SHOPPING SPREE! My mom and my brother are the stingy type of people that’s why they didn’t shop that much (except my ahiya who bought this electronic thing like an I-POD but is better and more expensive). On the other hand, my dad and I (ultimate shopping duo) totally splurged in Hong Kong. I bought so many things, from windbreakers to slipper/flip flops…I totally shopped a lot—and I still managed to save money for my next HK trip hopefully this coming semester break for the opening of Disneyland HK! Yeah!!!!

Favorite things I experienced in HK:
(Top ten)
1) People (most of them) are disciplined.
2) Electronics are so cheap plus you can roam around the place without worrying if someone might steal your cellphones or what because there are so many police officers roaming around the city.
3) Yen taw… enough said! Lol!
4) Shopping Paradise! My favorite shops are so big and had more selections.
5) No Traffic because all you need to do is to walk… you won’t be able to notice that you had already walked for a very long time because of so many stores around you.
6) The Chinese foods are so good!
7) The weather is perfect… not too hot and not too cold!
8) People in HK are nocturnal!!!!!!!!
9) The cars in HK are amazing!
10) Books are cheaper there… way, way, WAY cheaper!

One more week to go!

2005-05-15T11:39:00.000+08:00

Summer classes will officially end next week. I'm really excited for it since my family and I will have a family vacation somewhere and I'll finally have a break from all the academic stuff.

Summer classes are ruining my schedule to meet with my friends that I haven't seen for like a year now and my plans with my cousins and relatives! *sigh* Oh well, one week to go anyway.

I'm hoping i can post some more but I'm afraid that I need to go back and work on my lit paper. Until then, Cheers Everyone!

Got this from Matthew

2005-05-04T23:10:00.000+08:00

Your Birthdate: June 6

A birthday on the 6th of the month adds a tone of responsibility, helpfulness, and understanding to your natural inclinations.
Those born on the sixth are more apt to be open and honest with everyone, and more caring about family and friends, too.
This is a number associated with responsibility and caring - this birthday lends a degree of concern for others.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Bloody Hell

2005-05-04T19:11:00.000+08:00

I'm quite disappointed on the things happening on my academic world again! i thought that everything is going my way (at last) but it seems that the wind is taking me back to the same old course that gives unjust things and calls. *sigh* I' starting to lose hope again, fuck this day and the other day! Argh!

Frustrations, frustrations and frustrations... are slowly filling my nerves right now! Last week, I had all this confidence and hope that I could still get straight A(s) in all my subjects but there where a sudden change of events that "quite ruined" my hopes. Long test in lit was not that okay. We anticipated an objective type of test but it turned out to be an esay form. We were shock becaue based on what he said before... it would be an objective type test. The time allotted (spelling check) was not enough and consequently, I wasn't able to finish my answer for the last problem. Fil on the other hand, had the worst turn of events. I had difficulty on our long Test and i think that we had a low grade for our group report. *sigh... no wait, that's supposed to be a DOUBLE SIGH*

This is the time when I feel so low because all my hard works seem to be in vain. My confidence (that took me sometime to get back in my system) is slowly diminishing and I'm starting to lose my focus once again. Argh! I feel so down! Fuck this life!

Summer classes are killing me right now

2005-05-01T22:52:00.000+08:00

Argh, i thought that it would not be as hard as a regular term-- I'm totally wrong about it because summer classes are the worse!!!! The lessons are too fast and the readings are too long!!!!!! Argh, I need to focus more.... three weeks to go!

to debate or not to debate

2005-04-28T23:30:00.000+08:00

My last two years in high school was entirely spent in debating (probably except the last year where I tried to spend some time with my friends more than training). I could still remember the very first time I went and joined the school's debating team. I was this arrogant bastard who thought that I'm already ready for debate-- I was wrong. My first speech was a complete disaster... could have been the worst of all time (compared to other people). Ironically, i still liked it(debate) even if I looked like an idiot during my first speech (I still look like an idiot sometimes when I debate.. oh wait, even in normal scenarios!). I got hooked up by the "passion" for debating because of the words given by my former coach (TL). From then on, I would train from 7 pm up to 10:30 or 11 pm just to improve on my manner and my over-all debate performance. I read The Economist, searched the net for more matter and watched BBC for the latest updates. I even got to the point where debate was more important than my studies. I read debate stuff than read study for my geom test or my drafting subject. Debate was my life when I was in third year. All the hard work didn't pay immediately. I ,together with my teammate, didn't break for the first three tournaments. However, I still loved debate for some weird reason-- I was already living according to a debate lifestyle (as what Tl calls it). I got debate as part of my life... as a part of Wen's life. This passion for debating continued until I was in fourth year.

As I entered college, I was not that sure if I would still continue debating. My heart was saying yes but my mind was saying no. I'm somewhat restricted to debate because of some personal reason (from green to blue.... that would be treason (lolz)). I still continued reading The Economist but as time went by during my first year in college, I started losing my grasp over these things (matter stuff) because I felt that I'm justing wasting my time since I wouldn't be able to use these things in debate... even in conversations. (Would you expect me to talk about the failed Cancun talks to my friends in school???? OF course not!)

First year is finally over! I'm already a second year student who just shifted to Pol Sci. THe inner nerd in me wants to break free again and engage in an intellectually sophisticated discussion/argumentation. I want to debate again but I still have some things I need to settle first! Argh, why can't it be as easy as one, two, three....

"Someday, debate would save the world!"

fulfilled yet still looking for something else (the Irony #1)

2005-04-28T17:56:00.000+08:00

I'm quite fulfilled, rather very fulfilled with the things happening in school. I'm getting the grades that I think I deserve in school right now (hope this would last for a very long time). This is the first time that I'm really feeling the sense of fulfillment in school because I felt that my past two sems weren't that okay.... had stingy professors (not only that, terror pa!), heavy work load from my professors and others. I'm really thankful that all my hard work for the past few days had finally paid of. Thank YOU din God (ika-nga ni Mommy Bianx) for I won't be able to do it without You! :D

Amidst this academic fulfillment, I still feel that there's something missing right now. I tried to reflect on it the whole day but I simply can't figure that one out. Am I still asking for higher grades... I don't think so! Do I want to a vacation... yes (lol) but it's still not it! Argh, I'm becoming more numb when it comes to sensing my wants in life. Oh wait, probably I want to go to the mall and do something that is not giving me any stree, then again... no! *sigh*

As I'm typing this right now, I suddenly realized that this discontentment I'm feeling right now is just a part of human nature-- we simply can't get contented in life. Some people say that we've become so greedy that we want everything as much as possible. Looked at some people, MNC owners just like Bill Gates wants complete monopoly... even a local example, the Marcos family... they tried to get every thing as much as possible. Even in simple scenarios, we Filipinos want white skin complexion because we're more tanned and all and compare to the western people... they envy our skin. We simply want everything. However, I feel that what I'm looking right now is different... something I've always wanted in life that I've never gotten the chance to have. I just can't determine it right now. *sigh*

Filipino 14 and Me

2005-04-27T18:05:00.000+08:00

We had a very interesting discussion in our Fil 14 class today. At first, I thought that it would turn out to be boring because it’s about alamat and kuwentong bayan. However, our discussion turned out okay—great even! I’m thankful that our teacher in Fil 14 gives an in-depth discussion of these different forms of literature where she doesn’t limit her discussion within the boundaries of these literary genres because she goes beyond these things— discussing the reasons behind them (i.e.: social, economic and political reasons but still having a sense of humor and attachment to the lesson). I’m starting to like Fil 14 now.

Can say more things but I need to study Lit and Fil again… I’m already stressed yet it’s only the second week of summer classes. I need a vacation… asap!

2005-04-24T12:59:00.000+08:00

Hmm, it's sunday and the start of the second week of my summer classes. The past week was horrible! I wasn't able to focus on my studies because my mind was still flying somewhere wishing that I'm still in a vacation. Fortunately, I think I got my groove back and I'm now determined to study harder! *DL na toh!*

Anyway, as i was lamenting over my literary analysis yesterday, I was suddenly struck by picture of me having vacation with my family in South Korea. Funny enough, I did dream about it where I was lost in the airport and found myself wandering the street of Seoul that eventually turned to be a nightmare because I got transported to the palace of King Jong-Il (NK dictator). The guards were after me and they were thinking that I'm a spy of Japan! Waaah! Weird, weird dream!!!!!

Enough of this foolishness and i'd better go back and study fil 14... try to come up with a more sensible entry tonight....

Cheers!

Btw, please pray for my fellow batchmate who had a heart operation last thursday I think.... Thanks!

Ym with ditsi (camole)part 2 : 30 minutes of sheer enlightenment

2005-04-23T12:34:00.000+08:00

Ditsi... You're the best! :p heheheheh *peace*

camillectan: help
camillectan: what's central image?
JC: central: derived from "center"; as to be in the middle; to be a focal point
JC: image: an element mainly circumscribed under poetry; as "imagery"
JC: putting two and two together...
JC: central image is the imagery which the piece of literature (i presume) revolves upon
camillectan: ok...
camillectan: oo sige kahit ano
JC: pikon ka na?
JC: ehehehehehe
camillectan: hindi
JC: syet....
BUZZ!!!
camillectan: pikon ako sa papers ko haha
JC: hoy kelan mo uli kelangan yung inferno?
JC: mon pa dba?
camillectan: yup
camillectan: salamat
BUZZ!!!
JC: tingin mo, paskin head ako?
camillectan: yuck
camillectan: wag
JC: wait lng, serious tym nga tayo..
JC: break ka muna dyan sa ginagawa mo!
camillectan: oo sige
camillectan: alam ko na susulat ko wahahahaha
camillectan: nun nawala ako nun bata ako!
JC: ito ha, i'm not asking as your friend, neither am i asking as your english and lit papers' ghost writer and editor...
JC: i'm asking you as a complete stranger
camillectan: huh?
camillectan: okay
JC: dba astig, pwede mo sabihin lahat ng bagay sa isang di mo kilalalang tao?
camillectan: like that's possible but sige
camillectan: yeah hindi ko kilala sure
JC: its easier to talk to strangers sumtimes...
JC: anyway, my question is...
camillectan: but ur not a stranger
camillectan: but sige
JC: nasasarapan ka ba sa Spam? (Let the Games Begin)
JC: kasi ako sarap na sarap eh...
camillectan: wait may difference ba Spam sa spam?
camillectan: kasi may store na Spam
camillectan: iba yun sa canned spam na eat sa house
JC: yung breakfast food na spam
camillectan: ahhh
camillectan: yup
JC: yes, i thought weirdo ako eh....
JC: sarap rin pala makipag bonding sayo eh....
camillectan: bakit ayaw ng tao ng spam??
JC: you're very deep and insightful...
JC: iba ayaw...
JC: sarap nga basagin ng ulo nila eh...
camillectan: weird why dont they like spam
camillectan: i like ham tho
JC: ham or spam?
camillectan: ham eh
JC: oh god...
JC: tsktsktsk...
camillectan: sorry
JC: anyway, kamusta na kayo ni wes?
JC: hindi ako nanggagago
JC: hehehe
camillectan: san sa spam o sa wes? *(tanginang tanong yan)*
JC: pareho...
JC: i'm very serious about spam...
JC: and about wes...
JC: so what's up tan?
JC: alam mo, wala akong alam sa mga buhay ng mga kaibigan ko sa kolehiyo...
JC: ang alam ko lang eh binibigyan nila ako ng mga bond paper na may sulat, tapos ineedit ko yung mga mali...
JC: o kaya naman eh bibigyan nila ako ng mga libro, tapos pinapagawa nila ako ng paper....
JC: yun lang alam ko....
camillectan: lage mo kasama si anna
camillectan: now alam mo na gusto ko din spam *(Ayos, close na kami)*
camillectan: pero alam ko matagal mo na alam bobo ako sa english
JC: gago di ka nman bobo eh...
JC: you just dislike writing, thats all.
camillectan: i dislike because i cant write
JC: and di ka naman tlaga magiging magaling sa isang bagay kung di mo mahal gawin yun eh....
JC: you'll be surprised
JC: once you learn how to at least, like writing
JC: gagaling ka...
camillectan: when will that happen....
camillectan: sana soon
JC: nasa sayo na yun
JC: parang physics
JC: naaliw lang talaga ako na nahuhulog ang mga bagay pag binabato mo pataas... *(sabaw bro…)*
camillectan: ayaw ko yun
JC: tpos yung aliw na yun gets me a "d"
JC: eh pano pa kaya pag minahal ko ang konspto ng "gravity"
camillectan: sana hindi na nahuhulog mga bagay para masaya *(wooohooo!!!)*
camillectan: float
camillectan: c
JC: cguro nga stig yun noh...
JC: lahat nalang ng bagay nagflofloat...
camillectan: kamusta ka na chip
JC: ayos lang naman. gusto ko bigla ng spam... *(mga weirdo ampucha)*
camillectan: wala ba spam diyan?
JC: meron, pero tinatamad ako magbukas ng lata eh...
JC: hihiwain ko pa yun...
JC: hassle....
JC: eh ikaw tan?
JC: musta love life?
camillectan: kaso pag hindi mo ginawa yan, hanggang mamaya iisipin mo spam *(she has a point)*
Next Chapter….
camillectan: bakit ang hilig ng tao magtanong ng percentage?
JC: ksi, cams, ang buong buhay natin sa kasalukuyan ay umaasa sa pagkapayak ng numero....
camillectan: ngunit ayaw ko ng numero
camillectan: pangit ang mga numero
camillectan: kailangan mong magisip *(hahahahahahaha)*
JC: ano bang dream mo sa buhay tan?
camillectan: hindi ko alam
camillectan: kasi kailangan ko isip kung ano ang dream ko *(hassle nga managinip…)*
JC: sa bagay....
JC: mahirap rin gawin yun noh.... *(sumang-ayon naman yung gago)*
Hindi pa tapos…..
JC: tsktsktsk....
JC: pero astig kaya, kelangan na ng 50000 pesos para matuto ngayon...
JC: eh dati dati libre naman ang karunungan eh....
camillectan: sana hindi na kailangan magaral ng ganito
camillectan: hindi na kailangan pumasok
camillectan: matututo ka magisa
JC: eh ano naman matututunan mo mag-isa aber?
JC: cguro ako magbabato lang ako ng bola sa ere, at mangangarap na hindi na sya bumaba... *(cge lang chipeco, subok lang ng subok!!)*
camillectan: magtataka ka nalang bakit bumababa
camillectan: hindi ko na lam ano sinasabi *( parang kanina alam niya kung ano pinagsasabi niya dba?)*
JC: tingin mo, ano ang meaning of life?
camillectan: recreation
JC: tama!!!
JC: matalino ka, young jedi...
camillectan: gusto ko maging jedi
camillectan: para pwede ako kumuha ng gamit kahit hindi gumagalaw *(ledes and jentelmen,da youth op da nation…)*.
Afterword….
JC: nagtataka ako kay yoda...
camillectan: cute ni yoda *(may sablay talaga sa babaeng ito….)*
JC: paano niya nagagawa na iika-ika siya tapos bigla nalang nakakatalontalon pag may away...
camillectan: nagkukunyari lang siyang pilay *(ilang points kaya yung sagot na yun?)*
JC: eh buong sine pilay siya eh...
JC: kaya ba niyang magkuwari ng ganung katagal?
camillectan: para kapanipaniwala
camillectan: oo magaling siya e jedi master
JC: gusto ko ring maging jedi...
camillectan: parehas tayo
camillectan: gusto ko yung lytsaber na green
JC: ako gusto ko yung walang kulay. *(nahahawa nako sa kasabawaan….)*
JC: para mas epektibo pumatay...
JC: hindi nakikita ni darth vader yung lightsaber ko...
camillectan: pangit hindi patas laban
JC: kaya nga nasa laban ka eh...
JC: mas ayos pag di patas
JC: tpos ikaw yung may advantage
camillectan: walang challenge
JC: gusto ko baril...
camillectan: gusto ko matuto magpalipad ng airplane *(ayos yung kambyo ng topic ha…)*
JC: ano? yung mga &$&?
JC: 747?
camillectan: ano yun?
camillectan: basta airplane *(bigyan kita ng paper airplane eh…)*
JC: never mind
camillectan: na may propeler
JC: hahahaha nxt tym nalang tayo mag-usap
JC: kakain nako
camillectan: spam? *(and the fat lady sings….)*
camillectan: happy eating

YM with Mole Part 1

2005-04-23T12:30:00.000+08:00

Yes, this is the reason why I'm not bored whenever I'm with my colleger friends *Montenegro family*

annalyn_king: hmmmmmm................. cguro sa kasal nyu ni wes puro chamomile tea lang ang drinkssss............
camille : hoi
camille : wait
camille : i like tea
annalyn_king: whatttttttttttttttttttttttt???????????
annalyn_king: i dont like teaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: dont like cofeeeeeeeee eitherrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
camille : i dooooooooo
annalyn_king: don'tt like caffeineeeeeeee!!!!!
camille : chinese
camille : hahahaha
annalyn_king: me dontttttttt!!!!!!!!
camille : siba sa chinese dimsum
annalyn_king: kakasuka pait!
annalyn_king: hahah yeah chinese dimsum!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: siomai!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hakawwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: anu pa ba....... chiong fan!!!!!!!!!! lam mo un?? srap nun!!!!!!!!
camille : not pait
annalyn_king: tska ung cow's veins b un???
annalyn_king: hahaha
camille : chicken feet
camille : haha
annalyn_king: weee pero di ako dimsum dto.. sa hongkong lang or canada........
annalyn_king: YUCK!!!!!!!!!! don't like chicken feeeeettttttt!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: you're weird!!!!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: pati sa damit weird ng taste mo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: sa boys rin............... except aldrich and dexter.... and wes..............
camille : i like chicken feet
annalyn_king: hahah fine di hindi na sa boys
annalyn_king: hahahaha
camille : im not weird
camille : hahahaha
camille : seeeee
annalyn_king: you have chiken feet
camille : deedee cute
annalyn_king: bakbakbakbakkkkeeeeeeeeeeekkkk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: yes deedee cuteeee
annalyn_king: hahahaha
camille : chickennn
camille : dati kid meron ko chick
camille : it diead
camille : died
annalyn_king: hahahahahahahah!!!!!!! bkt died? baho raw paa mo??
camille : hindi
camille : i dont know
camille : freez?
camille : yun ducking hindi
annalyn_king: freez? wer??????
camille : then it grew to be a duck
camille : hahaha
annalyn_king: duck? tlga? then ate it?
camille : lamig sa gabi
annalyn_king: wawa chick!!!!!!!!!!!
camille : nooooo
annalyn_king: ung chick lamig? wawa.........
camille : kung anu anu pinapakain ko sa duck e
annalyn_king: nde mo kumot????????
camille : tas eat ko
camille : nooooo
camille : meron
camille : dapat daw light bulb
camille : didnt know
annalyn_king: makapal ba ung kumot?
annalyn_king: made of wat ung kumot?
camille : mamamatay
annalyn_king: anu name nung kumot?
camille : suffocate
annalyn_king: este nung chick!!!
camille : yellow!
camille : hahaha
camille : cute cute
annalyn_king: ngek gnun...... bkt light bulb? dpat hug mo ung chick
annalyn_king: yelow name????
camille : para daw warmmmm
annalyn_king: panget!!!!!! seeeee ala ka tlga tasteeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
camille : yeahhhh yellow siya e
camille : cute
camille : hahahaha
annalyn_king: malamang yellow chick!!!! hahahaha
camille : tas dati may bunny ako
annalyn_king: ung duck nu name?
annalyn_king: bunny????????//
camille : napaint ng paintr bobo dead na
annalyn_king: nu name? wat color?
camille : duck? quack hahaha
annalyn_king: hahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: napaint???????????????
camille : bunny white
annalyn_king: quack? yuck panget sbe sau ala ka taste eh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
camille : bunny name
camille : haha normal na bunny
annalyn_king: nu name bunny>? white????????????????
camille : eat carrot
annalyn_king: bkt me abnormal???????
camille : hindi color niya white
camille : hu abnormal?
annalyn_king: haha sabe mo normal na bunny eh! bkt me abnormal ba na bunny?
annalyn_king: color ni bunny white? anu name nya?
annalyn_king: baho jebs bunny eh
annalyn_king: pati room babaho..
annalyn_king: bkt kaw dami pets?
annalyn_king: ako wala......
annalyn_king: isa lang dog pero nde tlga sya sakin tska nde ko sya alaga
annalyn_king: kasi kadiri poop
camille : sa tas ng house nakatira sila
camille : haha
camille : no dog
camille : hindi ko natatakas papasok house hahaha
camille : puro bigay
camille : may hamster pa ko dati
camille : nawala
annalyn_king: nawala??????????????
annalyn_king: bkt??????
camille : duno
annalyn_king: napaint din?
camille : hindi
annalyn_king: haha teka wat happened ke bunny??
camille : as in nawala
camille : naka alis ng cage
annalyn_king: bkt na paint? anung color pinain saknya?
camille : hindi ko na nahanap
yep?camille : engeng painter hindi ata nakita bunny e spray paint yun
camille : dead na
camille : blue!!!
camille : sana purple nalnag
annalyn_king: hahaahaha white bunny became blue
annalyn_king: hahaha
annalyn_king: hahahaha!! o nga o yellow.......
camille : cute cute pa nun
camille : hindi orange!
annalyn_king: wawa bunny.. instant death?
annalyn_king: o nga.. or greenn......
camille : oo pag uwi ko from school sabi dead na
annalyn_king: nu gwa mo? cry?
camille : hindi
annalyn_king: bury?
camille : nakatunganga sa harap ng cage
camille : hahaha
annalyn_king: hahahaha naiimagine ko!!!!!
camille : ????
annalyn_king: wala lang.......
annalyn_king: wawa duck.. teka nde pa tpos! wat happened ke quack??
annalyn_king: dami mo pets a.......... bunny duck chick hamster
camille : duck buhay
camille : actually madami sila
annalyn_king: tlga? anjan pa?
camille : kaso one lang nabuhay hehehe
camille : wala na nu!
annalyn_king: ngek asan na?/
camille : pag uwi ko wala na
camille : binigay hwanaps sa basurero
annalyn_king: ngek bkt?
camille : then bili ulit ako duckling
camille : makulit daw
camille : lakad ng lakad
camille : la cage duck e
annalyn_king: hahahahahaha
annalyn_king: malamang!!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: duck lakad lakad nmn tlga e.. pus quack quack
camille : magulo daw e haha
camille : then buy ulit ako
camille : then lumaki ulit
camille : haha
annalyn_king: tpos anu gwa hwanaps?
camille : tas pinabigay ulit
camille : byebye
camille : na
annalyn_king: tpos bili ka ulet?
camille : hindi na
camille : ayaw ko na
camille : haha
annalyn_king: ay sayang
annalyn_king: no more duck
camille : no more
camille : hahaha
annalyn_king: tpos bunny?
annalyn_king: cnu bgay bunny?
camille : dont know na
camille : halo halo na e
annalyn_king: boyssssssssss??????????
camille : noooo
camille : girlsssssssssss
camille : hahahahaha
annalyn_king: seryoso? hahaha
camille : saan>
camille : ?
annalyn_king: na girls bgay pets?
camille : si
camille : hu?
camille : bunny cant remember
annalyn_king: eh ung iba?
camille : hamster boy
camille : duck akin yun e
annalyn_king: chick...?
camille : and chick
camille : akin din
annalyn_king: u buy?
camille : uhuh
camille :
annalyn_king: hahahaha
annalyn_king: hay..........
annalyn_king: ako ala pets...........
annalyn_king: ayaw momy dady
annalyn_king: dumi daw
annalyn_king: kadiri bantot
annalyn_king: tpos kantot tpos reproduce ng reproduce
camille : tas shck momi may animal sa taas
camille : ng house haha
camille : tas magagalit
camille : kaso ndyan na
annalyn_king: aso namin likes doing it
annalyn_king: kaya dami kami aso bantay sa gate
camille : samin sabi dirty
camille : la dog
camille : want dog
camille : biiiggg dog
annalyn_king: nooo don't like dog..........
camille : german
camille : u like what?
annalyn_king: ahh oo un! bigggg dog me want din
camille : oh yeah may fish pa ako
camille : dati
camille : dead nadin
annalyn_king: ayaw mga maliliit
annalyn_king: hilig tae
annalyn_king: tlgaaaaaaaaaaa????
camille : malaman big dog tae din
annalyn_king: hahaha si ahya rin dami fish pero lahat dead agad
camille : akin tagal
camille : 1 year haha
annalyn_king: yeah big dog tae rin pero mas bilis train!
camille : gusto ko saltwater
camille : nemo
annalyn_king: si ahya mga 3 consecutive ata... patay lahat
annalyn_king: ayaw ko fish!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: baho tae
annalyn_king: dati linis kme aquarium ung sa baba
annalyn_king: kadiri
annalyn_king: greasy pus baho
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
annalyn_king: hahaha ang sabaw natin mooooooooooolllllllllllllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
camille : ???????
camille : hoi
annalyn_king: bkt?
camille : dont tell me save mo yan?
camille : ??????!
annalyn_king: hahahaha good ideaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!
annalyn_king: ?????????!
camille : hooooooooooooooooooooooooo
camille : nooooooo
camille : pala
camille : hahahaha
camille : hohoho
annalyn_king: hooooooo????? hahahaahha
camille : santa
annalyn_king: hohohohohoho
annalyn_king: merry christmas
camille : i like santa
annalyn_king: ayaw ko santa gusto ko elves
annalyn_king: santa nde totoo eh
camille : ?????????!
annalyn_king: ?????!
camille : no elves widout santa
annalyn_king: no santa without elves!
annalyn_king: santa not do anything but ride reindeer and say ho ho ho mery cmas
camille : ???
camille : santa think
camille : elves do
camille : santa big boss
camille : BIG boss
annalyn_king: no!! elves think and do everything
camille : nooo
camille : santa gives elves good and bad list
annalyn_king: behind every Big person are small onessssssss.............
camille : then santa gives elves what toys
annalyn_king: is pla
annalyn_king: un nga give sya ng vie
annalyn_king: pus ala ginagawa
annalyn_king: db
annalyn_king: elves hirap do everything
camille : okay santa=elves?
camille : elves engeng paapi kay santa
annalyn_king: ala cla magawa eh
annalyn_king: wawa they're tiny
camille : they're many
annalyn_king: but stil tiny
annalyn_king: santa has big tummy
annalyn_king: elves bounce tummy's santa if they punch
annalyn_king: so they can't fight
camille : from back?
camille : from back?
camille : or tom or bottom or side
annalyn_king: santa will move his tummy and elves will bounce again
annalyn_king: then fly to the sky
annalyn_king: and land on the snow
camille : dont they fight in house?
camille : u bad
camille : elves like santa
annalyn_king: they have no choice but like santa
annalyn_king: they fight cguro
annalyn_king: why me bad?
camille : u make elves bad
camille : and santa bad
camille : elves and santa are buddies
annalyn_king: they are!! but stil elves wawa
annalyn_king: santa use them
annalyn_king: do elves get paid?
camille : free good
camille : and lodging
annalyn_king: free food?
annalyn_king: not enuf!
annalyn_king: elves tiny and work hard
annalyn_king: don't get money
annalyn_king: besides dami cla hati sa food
annalyn_king: nde busog
camille : they're small
camille : busog yun
camille : they're small
camille : busog yun
camille : and not takaw like you
camille : tiong tsia
camille : and mrs claus cooks well
annalyn_king: nooo...!!!!!!!! if they're 100 and santa gives them one piece of chicken
annalyn_king: they'll get only a bite or two
annalyn_king: not busog!!
camille : says hu
camille : ?
annalyn_king: i said wat ifff!!!!!!
camille : mrs claus cooks lots of food
annalyn_king: and see mrs claus also BIG so she and santa eat many
camille : mrs claus not big
annalyn_king: yes she is!
annalyn_king: says hu?
camille : me!

Evolution...

2005-04-23T11:54:00.000+08:00

It’s funny on how simple things lead to a more complicated and serious stuff. I really don’t know why this happens so naturally in most things we do. We start having simple work, relationship, ideas and as we spent time on them… these things suddenly evolve into much complicated ones, especially conversation.

I love talking about simple stuff (or as what chip refers to as “usapang sabaw”) and so do my college friends. Yes, I do love talking about these stuff because I already grew old talking about complicated/intellectual stuff just like how globalization is an empire repackage and other poli/socio/economic stuff that should only be discussed during academic hours. So there, we usually talk about ditsi’s pet before (quack the duck), clothes, houses, schools, vacations (ah yes, everyone’s hoping that our euro trip will really push thru *crossing my fingers), food (I’d still say pork chops are the most flexible food around), Santa and dwarves, spam (ung pagkain na paboritong topic nina Chip and Ditsi ‘pag usapang sabaw na *lolz*), the differences between boys and girls (ange!) and even our “dreams in the future.”

Anyway, our favorite “sabaw” topic is the one pertaining to our “dreams in the future.” Almost everyone in our block wants to be a lawyer since we’re BS Management, major in Legal Management (in short, LM students…. We really don’t know why the SOM department keeps on referring to our course that way *the longer version*) that’s why we keep on talking about our allusive dreams of becoming lawyers. We have funny discussions on the possibilities of facing one another in court.

Possible scenario number 1 *twinkle vs. chip*
Chip> You know what Atty. Dela Cerna, I’m trying to explain our side in the simplest way as possible so that you’ll be able to understand our case. *evil grin*
Twinkle> Evol! (her term for evil)

Possible scenario number 2 *ditsi vs. xiobe*
Ditsi> Howe…. Then hug!
Xiobe> Howe…. Hug din!

Possible scenario number 3 *cuz vs. me*
Me> You know what your Honor (debate mode.. RAR!)
Cuz> Cuz, here’s the bag you’ve always wanted… *winks*
Me> oh goodie-goodie!!!!!!

Possible scenario number 4 *mommy fats and ditsi*
Mommy> Anak, make mommy win this case okay?
Ditsi> Yes mommy, so that you can have money to go to the gym coz u’re fat! *sabay poke*

Possible scenario number 5 *xiobe, ditsi and me are all prosecutors*
Me> xiobe, go to the front and show the evidence…
Xiobe> no ahiya, I don’t feel like going there… besides, I would use a big amount of effort to do that-NO! (sabay, ahiya ilan ito while waving her hands *making fun of her ahiatsi’s eye sight problem)
Me> fine… spoiled impish kid! *poke* Ditsi, you go do that!
Ditsi> yaw!
Me> fine, let’s just call for another hearing coz I don’t want to stand there today.
Ditsi> okay… let’s just go to seattle’s!!!!
Xiobe> yay!!!! *habang tumatalon-talon!*

Yes, we do talk about these things-some are even worse! Lolz!

Anyway, since we love talking about these things… we also talk about the future we have in law school. Some of us plan to study law here while others plan to study law in the states. Mommy, ditsi, xiobe and I plan to study in New York- NYU LAW or in Columbia Law School. Every time we talk about that stuff, all of us become so excited that we already want to go there and study in New York and live as New Yorkers. We talk try to think of our plans if ever this (studying in NY) will push thru *hoping*. We talk about the things we’ll do there just like having jobs while studying *barista!* and the apartment we’ll be having there. We also talk about the serious details like our applications, plans after law school (which law firm our company we want to go to and why), business we’ll be building (how much capital would we need, would it be successful) while studying law and other serious stuff.

As I sit on the coach in my room and think of the things we talked about, I find it amusing on how from our “sabaw talks” evolve to a more serious topic-our future. It may still sounds funny and shallow for some but for me… it’s already a serious talk. Won’t you consider talking about your career in the future as a serious talk? Of course it is! It may just sound funny on how we talk about it but come to think of it… we’re already trying to make a lay-out of our future. Who knows, we might end up doing the things we talked about during our discussion moments or what we in the barakada refer to as bonding moments…. *winks*

So as to my conclusion, I think that all serious things started from simple thoughts and grasps-they may even come from funny thoughts just like our “sabaw talks.” It’s impossible for an object, idea, or what so ever to start as complicated and all… these things should have started from simple notions, commitment and understanding that evolved to a complicated stuff as humans ponder on them and get attached with it. It’s the development as time goes by where humans (we) get more attached to these things that we see them on higher level already. And it is that higher level of understanding and grasp that make things more complicated… more serious.

Death.... yes, you got it right!

2005-04-22T20:05:00.000+08:00

Hmm, first week of summer classes is finally over! *yay!* I can say that I'm not yet in the mood to study diligently as possible but I guess... I'll be back to my "acad mode" by next week (hopefully!). I really need to work harder if I want to graduate with honors in college and be accepted by NYU or Columnia University LAW school. *sigh.. reach for the stars and you'll be able to reach the moon!*

Anyway, my friend Anj told me how she has lost three (not sure on that) batchmates of her within this year. It's quite freaky because that number is a lot for a year or so for a batch that just graduated from high school last year. I feel sad because those three people cheated by death to be killed at very young ages-- their futures were stolen away from them.

It's quite absurd because Anj and I were just talking about death and what kind of funeral we want to have when we die the other day (talking about weird shit). It's not that i'm saying that I don't feel like talking about death... it's just that when we talked about it-- death became rampant again! Argh! Why do death needs get the young ones???

I can still remember the month of december in year 2004. It's probably the month which i considered the month of "death" for the so many cases of deaths that plagued the country even the whole world with the tsunami and all. It really found it ironic because december should be the month of celebration because of Christmas. Life sucks sometimes... oh wait, let me change that-- most of the time!

You might be wondering why am I talking about death. Well, I just feel like talking about it at the same time spend some time to yonder about that thing that many people are afraid of. Death is probably one of the most mysterious events in life for me. I find it so intriguing that I am not scared of it. I feel that the biggest question that i have will finally be answered if death would then have a visit on me-is there life after that? I really don't know but as a Christian (Catholic to be precise), I do believe that there is life after death. However, there could still be possibilities that life would just end there as you die as what the non-believers believe in. Isn't it nice to finally know the answer on one of the most intrguing questions? But again, there is a price to pay in order to get the answer-death... end of everything here on earth, which I'm not afraid of.

I could still remember when my 1st year religion teacher asked us if there was anyone ready to die as early as first year and I was the only one who said yes. Many of my classmates find my answer weird until now because they think that it's absurd! Who the hell would like to die as early as 14 years old.... I am! (I'm so weird!) I really don't get it on why people find it weird when someone tells them that he or she is ready to die. Is it wrong to say the I'm ready to die?

People from the time of the ancient times up to now value life so much that it will be considered as one of the the most important possessions a man can have-it even becomes the most important of all. This appreciation to life has been carried until our age that's why if you say that you're ready to die... you're giving away your most important possession according to other people which i totally find stupid. If the person feels that he or she is ready to die then let it be or respect his or her call. It's only that individual who can say if he or she is ready that's why other people should not say anything about it.

As for me, I'm ready to die if death will visit me (it's not that I want to die... it's just that I'll openly accept the fact if I'm about to die) because I think that I'm already fulfilled as a person. I've been able to go to places I wanted. I've been able to meet people who has changed my perception on life for me to become a better person. I've experience almost everything from triumphs and defeats to joy and sadness. I'm already fulfilled as a person but I'm not saying that I've gained everything because I also want to experience and gain more things in life. However, as for a simple life... I may say yes, I'm already contented that I can openly accept death.

*I repeat, I'm not saying that I wan to die already. It's just that it's okay if death will then visit me.... but again, as much as possible... I would still love to LIVE!!!! (winks)*

Slumbah Pawwwwteeeee!

2005-04-21T14:48:00.000+08:00

I'm still not in the mood to study (but I need to force myself to change it since I'm hoping to get a QPI of not lower than 3.6 *haha!*) that's why I went to Mommy Fats' place and slept there with xiobe, ditsi and twikie! We ate in Nipa House then tried to watch "Alfie" but unfortunately... PS2 wasn't that cooperative. Ditsi was so hyper last night!!!!!It was fun! I really want to spend most of my free time with my O2 family before I shift to polsci. College life will never be the same again without them. *sigh*

Anyway, my schedule for the weekends is quite hectic. I'm hoping to go to shirlyn's debut in Tarlac if I would be able to snatch a driver here. Then, I'll have to attend the meeting in LEX for the billmaking contest. After that, I need to study for my lit and fil class... and many more!!!!!

*parang wala akong summer*

Is it really a conditional love?

2005-04-19T17:48:00.000+08:00

We had a nice discussion a while ago in lit class under Mr. Acuna. It was about the peom, A Valedicticion:Forbidding Mourning. While we were discussing the peom, the notion of unconditional love was touched. According to the personna, the lover should not worry because what's prevailing between them is unconditional love. Therefore, even if they separate ways, they will still continue their love with one another since the foundation of their love is found within them... not on the physical aspects that's why even if they won't be together-their love will be as strong as ever. On the reflective part, Mr. Acuna took the example of the ideal bf or gf found in every teen-flick magazines. He told us that if you're asked to look at the answers of the interviewees, you will notice that all their answers point to their individual fulfillment. As he stated it, "it's always me,me and ME!" With such answers, we can say that the love most of us want is more of a conditional love rather than an unconditional love. After the discussion, it made me wonder on the possibility that the people in our time (especially the youth) indeed long for conditional love than the unconditional one.

"Have we become so attached with the physical world that the very foundation of love nowadays is based on the physical attraction that satifies our needs?"

As I recall, my classmates in high school would say that the number one reason why they courted the woman (yes, I came from an exclusive all-boy school) was that she was pretty to their eyes while some even said that the woman is their ideal girl (which means that she has reached the physical standards of the guy). On the other hand, I also asked some of my girl friends and even some of my cousin (females of course) on what would make them fall for a guy and all of them had something to with that guy fulfilling what they want in life. Funny but this scenario (among the population) is what Mr. Acuna referred to in his discussion. We simply want something in return in whatever relationship we have or we will have.

" I want someone who is nice and will make me laugh"

As I was reflecting on it, I told Chip (one of my college friends) about our discussion in literature. He told me that the perception of love during Donne's time is different than ours. Back then, people were afraid to blatantly tell people of what they really wanted in life because of a very conservative and idealistic background of scociety during those times. However, today is a very different era where life is so different back then. People are more open tgo different things as well as our perception of the different things around us has tremendously changed. Therefore, based on these changes, people become open to the fact that the main reason why they ask for someone's hand is because of personal fulfillment... alas, conditional love prevails nowadays.

I find it funny at first because I couldn't imagine that I've lived my 18 years (with short discussions to different kind of people and read a couple of teen magazines (yes, I do read other magazines besides The Economist)) without realizing that people do consider their own satisfaction in looking for the right one. How silly am I that I didn't know these things yet I know the complex structure of EU. Moreover, I suddenly realized that we've indeed become slaves of our own desires. We have been under the control of our physical desires that we already destroyed the true nature of things, ie:of what love should be.

I know that the unconditional love (the one I was referring to as what love should have been) is somewhat too idealistic to other people because it's quite impossible to see someone willing to give an unconditional love especially in a world where nothing and I repeat that... nothing is really free (based on a more realistic perspective)-- even love. However, to those who I know who are really hopeless romantics and really see love as pure and innocent from human's ignorance... conditional love do exist. It doesn't need to be in a utopian world for it to happen (unconditional love) because for these people...they have faith...faith that makes them believe on it and faith that keeps them live according to their beliefs.

People may differ on how they see love nowadays than those during Donne's time. Time may be a big factor in determining what kind of love do exist or what kind of love people uphold. However, amidst these differences of how people see love, only one thing will be sure-- people will fall in love in whatever shape it may be.

Mleh!

2005-04-17T21:58:00.000+08:00

I can't concentrate that's why I'm taking a breather right now. I want to write a long entry but I need to finish studying Fil 14 first. Oh well, here's a song that suddenly struck me a while ago. Since I was talking with my friends about their love stories, I think that this has been the major theme of all their stories. Oh well, here it is... (was able to watch the movie where this song came from)

Once In A Lifetime Lyrics

People fill their lives, with empty nights,

And days that slip away

Some search till the end of time, but never find,

The open arms of fate

One moment comes along, someone who’s a dream to you,

All at once your dreams come true

Once in a lifetime, you find the one you really love

For now and forever, one love that never ends

Once in a lifetime, when every star that lights the sky

Will shine with one reason, leading your heart to the one love you find

Just once in a lifetime

Some people live their lives in compromise,

And hide their dreams away

Some never take the chance, within their hands,

To claim the prize they make

When faith is all you need, to hold the hand of destiny,

Find the love that’s meant to be

If you believe in the power of love

And you believe that dreams come true

Magic will fill your heart, when that moment comes along

Just once in a lifetime

Once in a lifetime, when every star that lights the sky

Will shine with one reason, leading you home to the one love you find

Just once in a lifetime, just once in a lifetime.

What a Week...

2005-04-16T13:24:00.000+08:00

Distribution of Grades was okay. I got mine in just five minutes but everyone in our block had no QPI for the sem (and for the yearlyQPI as well because we had no Fil grade) that's why we went to the Fil department after that. I got an okay QPI this sem which is relatively higher than my first sem QPI even if i had Math 19 this sem with Mr. Marcelo. Thank You God!!!!!

Regday sucked big time for this sem. There were so many techincal failures that ruined the whole event. I went there on time just to know that my subjects were not required so i returned att around 1 and waited for 3 hours just to know that i won't be able to reg any subject for that day. The following day, went to ateneo as early as 6 am just to fall in line so that i can still get the subjects i wanted to enroll. Thanfully, I got the two subjects I wished for... thanks to twinkle who allowed me to go in front of her in the line. (singit is still the best way! lolz!). The line for paying (cash) was as worse as the reg. It took me 3 hours just to reach the cashier counter (10-1:30). HORRIBLE!!!!!!

First day of classes for the summer was okay. I got Acuna (for Lit)!!!! *yay!* I always wanted him to be my prof in lit because of the depth of his discussions and analysis. However, i was quite disappointed because he will not be like that anymore. The administration doesn't like the way he taught the subject before. Argh.. stupid administration! I also got Corazon Santos for Fil 14. Yes, another chairperson... i wonder if I'll get another chairperson next sem. hahaha! *winks*

Oh, went to eastwood with my bestfriends yesterday. SOOOOOOO FUN!!!!!!!!

I just moved...

2005-04-15T23:25:00.000+08:00

Okay, I finally hope that this will be the last time that I will move my blog to another site.... :p

I live... I learn

why...

last stretch...

so near yet so far...

having intimidating parents-in-law...how i wish!

Remembering EDSA I

what an irony...

waaaah....

double the struggle

As another chapter ends...

Paskuhan 2005

When will waiting for 'the one'... be done...

Christmas story part I

Venting out....

School equals to stress

Life in Second Sem so Far

so far....

random thought...

sembreak....

still running...

blah...

Melange....

Yes, I'm still alive---struggling though...

Who Says Life is Fair?

This is insane...

Mein Henz Brennt...

As we walk to two different paths....

when boredom strikes...

Extraordinary people I've met for the past 19 years....

I'm now 19... yeaH!

for the past few days...

You Don't Know Me.... *sigh*

Hong Kong 1/3

One more week to go!

Got this from Matthew

Bloody Hell

Summer classes are killing me right now

to debate or not to debate

fulfilled yet still looking for something else (the Irony #1)

Filipino 14 and Me

Ym with ditsi (camole)part 2 : 30 minutes of sheer enlightenment

YM with Mole Part 1

Evolution...

Death.... yes, you got it right!

Slumbah Pawwwwteeeee!

Is it really a conditional love?

Mleh!

What a Week...

I just moved...

You Don't Know Me.... sigh